Two words - Kaye’s Kitchen,  "Where Good Friends and Great Food Meet".

There are a few things I love about traveling, top on the list; local people and local food. My last visit to the High Country led me to the tiny town of Newland, NC. Growing up, I always got excited when I received a gift in tiny box. I learned two things, don’t despise tiny boxes and don’t judge a book by its cover. Newland, NC was tiny with a big gift. At first glance there wasn’t much to get excited about... until I stumbled upon a tiny 5-star hidden gem, with a 5-star owner, local people and fresh mind-blowing food.
 
Kaye’s Kitchen is a culinary favorite offering locally grown, made to order mouthwatering dishes, a large variety of wines and in-house baked goods. Also, on the menu are warm hugs and inviting smiles that greet you at the door. The entire vibe is warm and cozy with wood tones and lite scents of expresso in the air. It feels like home away from home; I hated to leave.
 
After being seated, I looked at the menu and immediately grew excited with the size of the menu. I knew whatever I ordered would be fresh and amazing. How did I know? I’m glad you asked; it’s simple. I’ve watched enough Kitchen Rescue to know when a menu is too large, it’s highly likely the food is not fresh or local. For starters, I ordered a beautiful lump crab cake with a fresh peppery salad. The crab cake was well seasoned, moist and full of crab (I ordered one to go – it was that good). 

​For dinner, I indulged in the beautifully grilled salmon served with a warm kale salad mixed with roasted sweet potato, pumpkin seeds, ginger and dried cranberry (just take that in for a moment), the smell alone was enough to take my breath away. To taste this dish was divine, I think it’s the best thing I’ve eaten all year.  The portions were plentiful and for the price point, the value is defiantly there.

Before dinner was over, Kaye made sure to come by the table. She is absolutely beautiful inside out. She was kind enough to pose for a photo capturing this moment in my memory forever. We connected on several levels…she use to be a red head, I’m a red head…that alone bonded us LOL.
 
My next visit to the High Country you can bet I’ll be at Kaye’s Kitchen ordering every entree on the menu for a mind-blowing mega tasting for a Queen (you should join me, it will be fun). Through my travels I’ve learned taking advantage of every moment and opportunity is necessary.  Never be afraid to have new experiences, taste new foods, meet a new friend and never talk yourself out of doing something you really want to do. Life is short, you only live once – Go for it.
 
I hope you plan to travel to the High Country soon. Be sure to make a stop by Kaye’s Kitchen. Tell her I sent you, she will be happy to see you. 


Here's to good friends and good food...Happy Travels, 

Xo, 

Kay

                                         WHO LIED TO YOU SIS?????????
​
My grandmother use to say, "A lie don't care who tell it" and she was right. Lies hurt, hinder and hold people captive. Lies can change the course of a person life before they know what hit them. How so? So glad you asked:

When someone (a loved one, the media, peers, a mate...etc)  lies to you long enough, you start believing it. Sometimes lies come from other people and other times lies come from within. We lie to ourselves to avoid painful realities because it's easier. Some people lie to avoid from hurting others and to avoid conflict.

Take me for example, I lied to myself for years making myself believe I would never find love, I'd never marry because of my size. I was suspect of men who showed interest in me and it was hard to trust their intentions. I told myself this lie to avoid being hurt. After meeting a beautiful man who loved me for me,  I had to learn how to accept a new truth that set me free: I was worthy of love and all good things. 

When I lived in D.C., a friend invited me to a workshop.  The workshop changed my life. I learned something very powerful and I am going to share it with you. But before I do, you have to understand the process. I had to learn who lied to me so I could kill the lie and free myself. I learned most of the lies I was harboring I created myself - Ain't that some mess...LOL. But it was true. I was holding myself back from what I wanted because I convinced myself Love would never happen for me. Once I decided to learn a new truth -The Freedom I felt was exhausting - so much so I fainted...(LOL). I literally fainted. 

Self Reflection Work:  
Who lied to you? 
Who told you that you could not be or do something? 
Who said you were not good enough? 
Who lied and said you didn't matter? 
Who lied & told you that you were fat and unworthy of love? 
Who lied & cursed your womb? 
Who lied & said that you would die before your time? 
Who lied & said you didn't deserve more than what you have now. 
Who lied & said you would die unfulfilled and feeling unloved and unwanted? 

If I didn't hit your lie or the lie someone told to you...fill in the blank for yourself, but whatever lie they told you...toss that crap in the trash. It is not your job to hold onto or carry lies that someone told you. Nor are you to create lies to protect yourself. The truth will always make you free, trust me!

The Truth Will Make You Free 
The truth is you are a child of the most high God. God desires for you to be in health and to prosper.

The devil is the father of lies. You have the power to "Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; (2 Cor. 10:5). But if you don't know the word of God you are powerless and unable to fight the devil when he attacks. You must know how to fight in order to keep your peace and joy. 

God wants the best for us. He loves to see His children thriving and living abundantly. We have to make a choice to live above and not beneath. We have to choose what we believe. God has placed greatness inside each of us for His glory. We have to stop thinking small and trust God's plan for our lives. So if you are someone who has settled with the status quo and you think this is the best you can do - or maybe you don't see yourself as powerful, beautiful and capable of doing all things through Christ; I offer you this: 

Through Christ you can do all things. God can do any thing but fail. God created us in His image which means if we seek Him and read His word, He has the blueprints for our lives to be great - You have to decide for yourself to walk in the light of all truth which is God the Father.

So, here is what I learned at the workshop: 

I learned "I am a powerful, loving and caring healer". Just having to say it out loud made me weep. For so long, the devil made me believe I was unworthy of the call on my life. The workshop helped me see myself for the first time without doubt. I can stand firmly and say I was born with great purpose and no one can do what I was born to do. I learned the power within. I learned that my voice matters and people want to hear what I have to say. 


I hope I have earned the pleasure of your time. I don't take it for granted when you take time to read my blog. I love to share and inspire you. It's apart of my purpose & I am so excited when you engage and comment. To leave a comment just click my picture. 

Here's to us living in truth and light, 

Lady Kay 

​Power Prayer: Father, thank you for removing the scales from my eyes so I might see the truth about who I am according to your word. Thank you for keeping me even in my unbelief. I now believe I was born with great purpose. Thank you for helping me become the best version of me I can be. Help me to renew my mind daily to become more like you. Thank you for giving me new sight where I was once blind. Thank you for loving me in and out of season. I am excited about who I get to be when I choose to know the truth which makes me free, In Jesus name, Amen. 

This Weeks Inbox Question:
"How do I work on changing my perception about myself? I hate my body, I'm not happy with myself. I don't like what I see when I look in the mirror. I don't know who I am. I am not as pretty as other women. I feel ugly. I need help. What do it do?"

Over the last month, women have messaged me with similar statements and questions like the ones above. Being a woman is tough. We are hard on ourselves without help from anyone. Women suffer with the "superwoman complex" which is an self-imposed unrealistic expectation to perform under pressure, take a licking and keep on ticking mentality along with the illusion woman can do everything. 

                                                                   My Response and Advice: 
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The Hard Questions
Answering these questions might require counseling or coaching:

1. Who does God say you are? What is your God given purpose? What are you pretending not to know about who you were born to be. Is it hard to see yourself in a positive light, if yes, why? 
2. Who gets to determine how you feel about yourself? What or who influences your thoughts about you? Who told you you weren't pretty, worthy of love and deserving of an abundant life? Who hurt you? Who do you need to forgive? Are you ready to move on with your life?  Are you ready to do something different in order to manifest something new? 

Self-Love Tips: 
1. Recite positive affirmations and pray God's word everyday (Very Important).
2. Speak life about yourself and situation (Avoid Negative Talk).
3. Evaluate your circle and make changes as needed.
4. Ask for help and accountability from someone you trust to support you.
5. Know you have the power to change but it will require dedication & hard work.
6. Be open to counseling and or coaching if you aren't't able to process this alone. 
7. Forgive yourself for your mistakes & move on; no one is perfect. 
8. Start a journal. 
9. Find new hobbies and occupy your time with things you enjoy. 
10. Give back - Give yourself purpose by investing time in something greater than yourself. 
11. Learn to Trust yourself and your instincts (Very Important) 
12. Give Yourself credit for the small things. Celebrate every victory...

My prayer for you is that you will allow God to love you past your pain, deepest fears & emotional wounds. Let His love heal you and make you new from the inside out. Renew your mind daily with the Word of God and choose to believe that you are the apple of His eye. You have been bought with a price and Jesus is always with you. Know that He desires for you to live in abundance and be in health. Find yourself in His reflection and truth and let your light shine. 

As always, I hope I have earned the pleasure of your time, thank you for being here. 

Have a beautiful day - Share Love, Grace & Kindness to yourself first & others second. 

Stronger, Wiser, Better; But Don't Test Me! 
 
XO, 
Lady Kay 

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 I neglected myself for years in the name of pursuing “my life’s purpose” caring for, pushing, supporting and encouraging others. Girls who grow into women are taught to serve and cater to others. We are taught to sit pretty, cross your leg at the ankle, chew small bites, don’t spit, be polite, smile, be seen not heard; we learned how to cook and clean, sow, keep house and be strong. The generational mentally of serving and surviving was passed down like a badge of honor.  
 
Learning to love yourself is a personal journey. Women often find themselves in positions as a result of indirectly making choices based on childhood values that say put others before yourself. The older I get, the wiser I become. It’s a fact I have been called to serve. As a leader, I was taught the first duty is to serve. I love to serve, and I’m great at it. Here’s the kicker - - I had to come to terms with the fact it’s necessary to serve and ensure my wellbeing before I can do it for someone else. This is the part most women never learn or they learn it late in life. 
 
For years, I willfully neglected myself in every way you can think of. It was easier to focus on others vs. dealing with my issues; the biggest of all, my weight. I've been fat my whole life. I was content being fat, it didn't keep me from doing what I wanted, I wasn't sick so I just kept going. I ignored a few things and prayed God would keep me. Afraid to go to the doctor because I knew if there was bad news, it would be my fault. I focused on helping others ignoring my needs. I’m sure God honored my service, however, I forgot to honor myself. 

After several months of feeling stuck and unfulfilled – I came to terms with what was festering in the back of my mental closet. Once I accepted how unhealthy I was and came to terms with my mental, spiritual, physical and emotional posture, it was easier to make small changes. Creating a new normal is never-ending. I am in the infant stages of becoming a healthier me, so I can be a better for those I love and for those whom I am called to serve.
 
There is liberation in self-care.

These are my personal daily reminders – Feel free to use what you need and share the rest:

1. I am Human – I am not superman or superwoman.  It’s my responsibility to take care of myself. I am committed to giving myself the best of me unapologetically.
2. I am a Gift - Everything I was born to be and the reality to match is within. I am unworthy yet God loves me no matter what. I have sinned and fallen short. No sin is greater than the next. I am forgiven. Neglecting myself is sin.  God chose me, He created me, and He crafted me in His image. No one can do what I was born to do. I will own my power and get right within. 
3. I Deserve the Best of Me - NO MATTER what happens, I am 100% responsible for YOURSELF. Everything I do is a choice and a reflection of how I value myself. 
4. I Will Let God Lead Me - Order my steps Lord. God is always waiting. I can call Him and by faith I know He will answer. I am never alone.
5. No Excuses - No Validation - The biggest mistake people make is the overuse of excuses and the tantalizing need for validation. The only validation I need is from the word of GOD. I will not conform! 
   
   Always remember - You don't need or require the approval of others. You are a gift. Your life is a gift. There are people waiting for you that need you to effectively utilize your gifts. Get aligned and move towards wholeness. You are worth the fight.

 
Coming to terms with unhealthy behaviors requires honesty. Being honest with yourself about your needs, health and goals is important. The road to healing and wholeness is not easy, but you must go through the process. Every day renew your mind with God’s word and recite positive affirmations. Take it one day at a time and remember to be good to yourself. 28 days of consistent behavior modifications leads to consistent outcomes and positive life changes.
 
As always, it is an honor to have earned the pleasure of your time. Be good to yourself. Life is a journey, live everyday like it's your last and take nothing and no one for granted.

My prayer for you this week: Focus on yourself, your goals, and Gods plan for your life. It’s honorable to help others but taking care of yourself is God’s will, in Jesus name, Amen.

Here’s to God & Coffee!

Have a great week,
Lady Kay  

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