Submitted by: Samaria Colbert, LCSW
We live in a fallen world, where we exist within a sinful nature, witness natural disasters, and have endured years of racism. In many ways regardless of the trappings of sin, shame and abuse, you can go to God broken, needing repair, and in need of a Savior. Our Savior is the King of Kings and Lord of Lord, Jesus Christ.
Many leaders and helping professionals are starting to experience extreme exhaustion, burnout and compassion fatigue. We are slowly being ushered into our broken place. Here are ten tips that helped me get through my broken place and I hope they will help you. These tips are not in any particular order nor are they all inclusive. These are just my personal tips from what I learned along the way.
Number 1: Determine not to give up.
I know that sounds cliché but while in your time of brokenness, the most profound feeling you will have is the feeling of wanting to give up.
It is not a matter of if you feel like giving up, you WILL feel like giving up. There will be a still small voice in your head that says, give up, commit suicide, this is too much for you. Regardless of how you feel don’t give up. Feelings are just that feelings it is when you act on them that you give them power. Just because you feel a certain kind of way doesn’t mean it is true. Your brokenness often gives us an unfair misperception of who you are. You are not a failure. There is always a way to hope beyond your circumstances. It starts with a decision, not a feeling of hope and decision to hope.
Read Psalm 27:13-14 (NKJV). Make a decision to hope against all hope. Make a decision to believe when you don’t have a reason to. Do like David said in Psalms 27, just wait on Him, and He will give you strength in your heart.
Number 2: Arm Yourself.
Remember the battle is not really flesh and blood, it is a battle for your soul. The only way to win this battle is to understand that we are at war with the kingdom of darkness. There is war waging in heavens on your behave. Yes, you are going to win but you do have to fight. You may be weak but fighting it necessary. You can’t fight spiritual wars with physical weapons. You must fight to win. The only way to protect yourself and win this battle is to put on the armor that God provides.
Ephesians 6:10-18 (NKJV) (Read Scripture)
The armor of God helps you to stand. You can’t defeat brokenness living in the sin. Get delivered. Remember faith is a shield that protects you and brings what you desire to pass.
Number 3: Prayer, Praise and Worship
Just keep praying, praying, and praying. Regardless of how you feel God hears you. He may not answer right away but keep your face before God He will respond.
Don’t focus on what you don’t have praise God. Praise Him for who He is, even though you may not be out yet of your brokenness, praise Him for bringing you out. Worship, play some good worship music. Sit in an alone place and soak in His presence. Worship sets the atmosphere for God to show up.
Number 4: Seek Wise Counsel
I had an incident recently where I was not sure what to do. So, I called my Aunt. She is a godly woman and would give me wise counsel. She talked to me for almost an hour. Although she didn’t tell me anything new. She did confirm that I was making the right decision. I had once again, taken on too much. Another problem I am getting delivered from.
She affirmed me and confirmed the word God gave me previously. She also confirmed that I was not weak in my limitations. We all have limits and I needed to be clear about mine. Still sometimes a right decision, in the end will hurt someone else, still it is a right decision. I wanted to help someone I love, but I realized although I loved them I was not in a position to help. My point is we all need someone who will give us godly counselor. They need to tell us when we are right, wrong or indifferent. They know us, so they know what we can and cannot handle. Seeking wise counsel is wise. Notice I said wise counsel, not just counsel.
Anybody can counsel you, but a wise Christian counselor is something different. My aunt is a godly woman who gave me the encouragement I needed. But, I did not go to her for mental health counseling. If you need mental health counseling, seek a trained professional.
Number 5: Rest, Self-care & Boundaries.
Turn your cell phone off, take a long staycation or a vacation. Remember a no is just as powerful as yes. You will never recover from brokenness if you don’t take care of yourself. Healing is a process. You’d be surprised how a few days of rest will start the healing process. Take a few days to rest when you need too. I know some are saying, “I don’t have time to rest.” My only response is what if your life depended on it? Yes, you can keep going and going yourself right into a stroke, or a heart attack.
So, you don’t have time to rest? If you don’t have time to rest, you don’t have time to heal. If you keep going things will get progressively worse. I sound harsh, but this is a harsh reality. You don’t want to work so hard your body shuts down to the point where you have to rest because your body stops operating. Remember you are not as young as you use to be, you can’t take a licking (emotionally, spiritually, physical) and keep on ticking. It will catch up with you.
Number 6: Understand your purpose.
Remember your brokenness is grooming you for purpose and fulling God’s divine plan for your life. Your brokenness is not just because, it is for your ministry, your testimony and your prosperity. When you understand the purpose of your pain, you will understand the purpose for your life. You will also have an inner hope to carry while going through the trials of life.
Number 7: Declutter your life.
Declutter negative people out of your life. Look at all your activities and declutter yourself from unnecessary projects. Realize what is your responsibility and what is not your responsible. There are some things you have to let go of. You can’t be all things to all people. Declutter your life.
Number 8: Pray the scripture.
Take out scripture that specifically speaks to your circumstance. For example, if you are struggling with severe anxiety or fears. Get as many scriptures about fear and worry and declare deliverance over your life.
You say out loud the scripture below.
2 Timothy 1:7 (KJV) “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”
After that, pray “Lord I thank you that you have not given me the spirit of fear….”
Whatever your unique situation is there is a scripture found in the word of God. When you pray the scripture, God has to respond to His own word.
Number 9: Make a decision to forgive.
You will never get healed from brokenness with unforgiveness in your heart. It is not possible. Forgiveness is hard, but it required. I wrote a book entitled, Healing the Heart Through Forgiveness. I encourage you to pick it up.
Number 10: Attend Church
There is nothing like a good church service. God will speak to your pastor directly about your situation. There have been times where I felt like my pastor must have been sitting in my house watching the goings on of my life. I remember years ago, I was going through a major struggle. I relocated to North Carolina and was in need of a church home. I remember it like it was yesterday. So, I went to this one church and the Holy Spirit takes over the place. The apostle of the house gets up and has us to hold our neighbors’ hand. He then said, “we are all hear gathered together, but you don’t know what the next person is going through. You don’t what it took for them to just get out of bed this morning. The person sitting next to you is in the midst of a struggle.” That just completely wrecked me. I was crying literally uncontrollably. Then he had us to pray for our neighbors. That day I was healed when I left the service.
I ended up joining the church and being a member for years before I moved to a different city. My point is that one service changed my life, because I was struggling so much at the time and my broken place was so unbearable I had decided to return home, knowing full well God had told me to come. That day I was given strength for the journey. The church is a supernatural entity by God uses to heal hearts and mind. A good church service will do what six months of intensive therapy cannot do. i always say go to a church where God is moving. Don’t go to the church of the frozen chosen expecting a breakthrough. You will have to get out of your traditional mindset. You will have to determine not to be offended by alternative ways of worship. Corinthians 3:17 (KJV)
Bonus Number 11: Know your Weakness, and Triggers.
We all have areas of weakness and vulnerability. If you are in recovery from alcohol addiction you may not want to go buy a soda from the liquor store. If you know you have a weakness to a certain thing you may not want to be around the persons who are engaging in your weakness. Recovery from brokenness also means changing persons, places and things.
Lastly remember God is the one who will renew your strength spiritually, emotionally and mentally. Getting to your quiet place, spend time alone with Him, soaking in His presence. The Holy Spirit will begin to meet you where you are consuming your heart and refilling your spirit.
Isaiah 40:31 King James Version (KJV)
Samaria M Colbert © 2015. Broken: God’s Plan To Restore You When You Have Been Damaged Beyond Repair. For more from Samaria see www.kingdomcreartivecounseling.com
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